5 January 2012

Lessons learnt from Courses

Made a summary of the key lessons that I learnt during my recent 4 day of courses at HQ. They are as follows:

1) Behind every anger is hurt. Anger is an expression of hurt, it’s a symptom.
 2) We need to vitaminise them, give them things that will help them.
3) Students need to have at least one caring adult in their lives to succeed. [Henderson and Bela (1994) study]
4) Teach correct way to discharge anger – we do not need to respond in anger in return
5) Our youths don’t know how to plan for the long term.
6) Choose a career that encompasses their: strengths, passions and values
7) Are they drowning by their own choice (time to let go), or are they drowning because they need help (time to help them).
8) Teach youths: I I can do it; effective use of time.
9) Learn to see the belief systems behind the behaviour. i.e. try to understand why they do what they do. Belief drives behaviour.
10) Affirm and believe in them. It will change their lives
11) Don’t give advice. Let them come to their own actions.
12) Theory X and Y. X thinks that all people are no good and lazy. Y – thinks that people will make effort and be better.
13) McClelland’s 3 needs – all need achievement, power, affiliation.
14) A misbehaving child is always a discouraged child – Dreikurs.
15) Story of Chin Huat – ST article. No good in class, but very adept in the hawker ctr.
16) Look for the menta models to understand where they are coming from.

Things to try:
1) Ask students: If there is an emergency and that you need to call an adult, who will it be?
2) Draw a diagram of who are your best 3 friends in class – to see the links. To link them with friends that are helpful with them.
3) Start afresh after years of failing – paper writing and then tearing process
4) Don’t scold first. Try asking questions to understand; and then to provoke thinking about the consequences of their actions.
5) Find a man same age as me to illustrate what happens when one is given the environment and one is not.
6) Give those who are out to challenge you the power of choice. Avoid power struggle. 

Now to apply them in my teachings...

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