10 August 2007

I am with you, heart and soul

Leaders are those that have followers. Hopefully, whole-hearted followers who will fully support them with their heart and soul. We see a lot of leaders nowadays. Some claimed to be leaders. Some are leaders by appointment. While some rare few are leaders by leading and gifting.

I do not see myself as a true blue leader. Possibly, one who when there are no other leaders around, step up and fill in the gap as a temporary leader. I am more of a follower. I think i can work better in support of another leader.

Today's QT passage in 1 Sam.14.7, Jonathan's un-named sword bearer stands out. He is one who will follow his leader through thick and thin, in war and in peace. His timeless words, “Do all that is in your heart. Do as you wish. Behold, I am with you heart and soul.” is encouraging and is something that all leaders wish to hear from their followers.

I am encouraged by this un-named hero's faith in his leader. Not all of us give full support or even token support to our leaders. In my workplace, we don't. Most of us say bad things about our leaders and have little faith in them. The bosses' actions did not help, neither did our words and gossips. Sigh, I need to repent here.

For me, I too want to serve in a worthwhile cause in church, under a capable leader. Since there are no Philistines to kill this day, my heart is searching for a worthwhile ministry to serve in. Recently, an old friend approached me to serve in the Cantonese ministry. But, I do not think this is for me. There is no heart-tugging. No slight desire for it at all.

I have promised to help out in the Befrienders ministry. I went once and did my part though there was no 'business' on that day. I was a bit disappointed as the person in charge was not there to help me settle in and there was no follow through too.

I used to wonder why people do not serve in any ministry in church. Now I have some answers. While we want them to serve, we also need to hold their hand and guide them along. It is not easy for a new person to settle in - there are too many unknowns and temptations to skip service. We need understanding and patient guides to help us.

Life becomes meaningful when we have something to live for and die for. It is sad when we do not have. Many are driven to depression and ultimately suicidal when there is no more meaning in life. What am I living my life for? Which ministry can I say that I am with it (and with the leader) heart and soul?

It is still a question that I have no answers now.


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